Cranmerry Christmas

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December 25, 2012 Tis the season to eat mali. Just kiddinggg. To be jolly. And I was quite jolly. As jolly as one can being sandwiched between an overweight man and the window on a flight back to the city on christmas morning. But don’t feel bad for me. That man kept me relatively warm … Continue reading

You’re Just In Time

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December 3rd 2012 “Final boarding call for flight 1372 to Charlotte, North Carolina” . Renee looked                   at her boarding pass. Shit. down Flight 1372 was departing at 12:59pm sharp. It was now 12:38pm. She took off >> sprinting towards terminal 6, beelining for Gate C30 in … Continue reading

Good Luck! Good Job! Oh Okay.

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December 14th 2009 It was beautifully routine.  Somewhere over the course of the years my friend and I established a fairly balanced “keep in touch method.” You text me. I text you. You call me. I call you. You like my Facebook status. I’ll mentally like yours. And sometimes when miniature communication just didn’t seem … Continue reading

A Piano, Some Gin, And A Pack Of Sweaters

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December 15th 2012 Oops, I did it again. SantaCon. What’s SantaCon? This: “The annual mass gathering of people dressed in Santa  costumes parading publicly on streets and in bars in cities around the world. “(And in this case New York City) . . . So basically: . The debauchery of this event is intended to be … Continue reading

The Mystical Compliment

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December 7th 2012 Here’s what happened. I was lookin good. Feelin good. Hair slicked back in classic bobby-pinned style sipping (chugging) my freshly purchased beverage in the far corner of the bar. Wait. Wait Wait. This makes me sound like a cowboy doesn’t it? Alright listen I was pretty much just jiving along to a … Continue reading

The Rejector And The Rejectee

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May 6th 2012 We’ve all been there. Been the victim of a good old-fashioned rejection, even if we didn’t know it (except we really kind of did) and then made excuses for them. Such as: . The texting rejection: . “They must have not gotten my text. Did it go through? Let me check. Okay … Continue reading

Demetri Martin

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December 2nd, 2012 “I like parties, but I don’t like piñatas because the piñata promotes violence against flamboyant animals. Hey, there’s a donkey with some pizzazz. Let’s kick its ass. What I’m trying to say is, don’t make the same Halloween costume mistake that I did.”  – Demetri Martin Now, I forgot to tell you … Continue reading